Tuesday, November 3, 2009

No White Shoes After Labor Day, No Horizontal Stripes. If You Lived Through a Fad the First Time Around, Pass Up Any and All Resurrections.

Just curious: what do we think about these?
( This coming from a girl who may or may not still own a hair scrunchie depending on semantics and the width in millimeters of the ruching.)

I ask because I think these denim stretch pants might be cute with a chunky oatmeal-colored turtleneck sweater on a cold winter day. And as hard as it was for me to type "stretch pants" I need to tell you I would never ever not in a million Ferris Bueller Days Off wear them with patent stiletto heels but with boots. Or something. Yeah. I mean, am I crazy? Am I verging on these?
Or better yet, this get-up? Though, fuck--I actually like that embroidered denim shirt in a slightly ironic though truth be told also sincere way, not with stirrup pants, mind you--never stirrup pants. But thrown over a tee-shirt worn with a simple black a-line skirt? My scrunchie's on too tight, isn't it? You'll have to pardon me if I pause to catch my breath on this here split rail fence.
So these, you who talked me out of Crocs, what do you think? My hesitation lies not so much in the stretch pant moniker as it does the elastic waist band. They look like maternity jeans; as it is one too many UPS delivery guys have congratulated me when the only bun in my oven is a hot cross chocolate croissant for lunch. So?
Save me from myself. Hell, save yourself! November 3rd--I believe today is Election Day so cast your vote. What do we do in the face of these 80's fashions that have come back maybe a little bit cuter? Plastic earrings and shoulder pads, Sussudio, crap that means nothing but gets stuck in your head nonetheless. Sussudio, oh oh oh, Just say the word...

32 comments:

jennifer said...

omg! don't do it!
unless of course you plan to wear it with an oversized button down collared shirt that HAS TAILS!!
perhaps a large faux gemstone brooch at the neck???

Lauren said...

I'm going to be honest and say i thought they were maternity jeans. BUT with a long shirt noone would see the waist, and I have a pair of regular button top jeans that look just as tight so I have to go with cute. But not with heels. Boots. *Maybe* cute flats. And always with a longish top.

Anonymous said...

Do it!! Do it!! rock those mf'ers with heels, boots, or converse!! make em your bitch! you can do it susannah.

Erin said...

The whole '80s resurgence this season is very disturbing to me, mostly because the decade was a fashion disaster that never should have happened once, let alone twice. That being said, I have seen a few pieces out there that are updated enough that they are actually cute. These jeans fit the bill, but, ONLY with a long top, because they do look like maternity pants at the waist.

Zakary said...

No, those are not okay.

But what the hell do I know. I'm sitting here in my husband's pajama bottoms and a Miller Lite tee shirt.

Peggy said...

Hi, I'm a new reader today and I have to say...I love these jeans! If I could fit in them I would definitely go for it!
(the denim shirt, not so much)
Go for it!

Cindy said...

My mind automatically also went to a chunky oatmeal sweater and boots!

My verdict: I like the look of skinny jeans in general (my saddle bags and looong feet are not a match -- bootcut all the way, for me), but the "denim tights" description was a deal breaker. And that waist is only good for a Thanksgiving meal. (Think Joey on Friends wearing maternity pants aka "turkey eatin' pants.")

Under no circumstances are you allowed to wear the embroidered denim mom shirt.

xo

Arlynn said...

Jeggings = a cross between jeans + leggings.

I posted about them a while back, because I couldn't decide & there was an overwhelming negative response...

Although a gal in my office looks super cute in them & was the inspiration for my post, so maybe there's still hope out there somewhere for Jeggings.

Sarahviz said...

NOT a fan of the skinny jeans.

Actually, it's not ME, per se, it's more my ASS that's not a fan.

*sigh*

krista said...

okay, i'm somewhat of a "hipster" throwback, my affinity for thrift store clothing and all. but please, FORTHELOVEOFALLTHATISHOLY do not buy elastic waisted jeans. see, it's not the stretch. stretch is good because, you know, they give and let your girl bits relax a bit, unlike the skinny jean with little to no stretch. HOWEVER, you have crossed a threshold of no return when you start wearing elastic waisted denim.
(okay, i'm done. you know you can wear whatever you want and i'll love you just the same. yes, even stirrup pants. i'll make fun of you but i'll love you just the same.)

Weitzell4 said...

I just bought my first pair of non-boot cut jeans since the '80s the other day after trying on literally a hundred different styles. They are Lucky brand, and will fit nicely into boots if I so desire but do not in the least look '80s, or maternity. Good luck!

vicki archer said...

These pics are hysterical....I can't stop smiling over those stirrup pants. The jeans with that strange waistband... leave them alone I think. xv
PS thanks for the giggle

anita said...

um.....no.
just no.

Cathi said...

Haha...you always make me laugh so hard. I say NO to those jeans too! Although I am a boot cut girl myself, just that elastic at the top makes me think 80 year old lady or pregnant, take your pick!

I knew I was doomed, when I too fell for an embroidered denim shirt, it was however a holiday shirt - which truly hit home that this girl was getting freaking old...haha...It didn't stay long in my wardrobe..i quickly came to my sense...!

tiffany said...

I love them! Own it!!!

I agree that if you're at all apprehensive, start out with awesome boots or flats. Then maybe move up to some heels. A bonus: they're probably super comfy!

MFAMB said...

those stirrups are fucking amazeballs. but only in this way...(jenny calls susannah on phone) brrring...brrrring.."hello?"
"hey susannah come over here i want to show you something". "what is it?" "just come over...you'll see". "oh..all right you crazy ass freak" knock knock..."hey look at my new pants" susannah....GALES of laughter.

meig said...

You're blog never ceases to bring a smile to my face! I don't even know how you found pants like those, but if you love 'em, own 'em!

Gina said...

I think they are adorable, and if I wasn't 6 months pregnant I would totally buy them.

I wonder if I could get away with wearing them...

Jules said...

Maybe it's a so-Cal thing, but I see this look all the time: jeggins/leggings, chunky (oatmeal) sweater, Uggs, beachy-hair. I don't have the body for it, but if you have thin enough legs and a slim/boyish figure, it looks really cute. Since I've been losing weight, everyone keeps telling me to do the leggings to save money on clothes. I don't know--I just don't have the wispy legs to pull it off!

Cindy said...

Jeggings! Amazeballs conversation!
BWAH!hahahahaha

Richie Designs said...

I can only condone skinny jeans with flats [boots/shoes] and a yes a chunky sweater would be good. I do not have the thighs to pull it off but you, cute thing, do ;)

-------
The denim shirt? it could be done but you would seriously need to rock the house down with something funky to pull it off. I would skip this one for now.

Mya said...

I'm partial to the pants. Especially good for use at long dinners and on fat days when nothing else will go over your ass!

Oh Brother! said...

I don't even know you anymore!

Love,

bro

Minus75 said...

I have to say, they're appealing to me. Chunky sweater, cool boots. Perfect for the Thanksgiving feast!

Leslie said...

At least they APPEAR to be jeans. I walk around counting women who choose to wear black spandex leggings in lieu of actual pants. Leggings and a tunic or long, ass/crotch covering top? Okay, fine. but a shorter regular length top and just straight up leggings? not actually a complete outfit.

I'm about ready for skinny jeans to die. I have a few pairs myself and only wear them with boots that go over them. Something about the ankle hugging makes even skinny girls appear to have elephant calves. I've switched to straight cut jeans.

I just feel like at the rate we're going pants are going to be a thing of the past and we're just going to be spray painting our legs.

Meghan M said...

Giddy up.

Simply Mel {Reverie} said...

If it were not for the strange band at the top, I would say yes, but the elastic things scares me a bit!

blanco said...

The whole 80's revival is a bit scary right? Structured shoulders are back, and that's fair enough.
But not many people suit shoulderpads, in fact it's probably a majority.
That being said, the jeans with the elastic waist are actually quite cute - although I'd wear a long-line top to hide the band.
I agree with the boots, or maybe cute flats.
Never go for stirrup pants. I think I had some when I was 7...
Bad times.
Lovely post!!

Sarah Ring said...

I say no to any pants with a stretchy waist band beyond yoga/work out gear, maternity wear or pajamas.

Althought I did conider these for a few minutes trying to justify.

Petunia Face said...

Hm, well it sounds about 50/50 here. In my highly systematic, scientific poll. I think I may need to try them on. With a chunky sweater and boots, of course. :)

JackeeG4glamorous said...

Listen pencil legs, if you have a cute ass and long lean legs, Totally do it!
If not...pass.

And just for the record, I kind of miss shoulder pads.

katiedid said...

I let out a little scream the other day in a department store when I saw a real pair of stirrup pants back from the dead on a display. And no...it was not Halloween. My daughter was so embarrassed. And please....say "no" to the embroidered shirt OK?