I was all set to write a blisteringly honest post about the inauthenticity of the positivity of blogs, about the wwwonderful landscape of Instagrammed images of things to do with mason jars and letterpress, though not always at the same time, of cherub-cheeked children nary a snot-nosed scream in sight and the latest skinny jeans to be had because ohmyfuckinggodyouguystheycomeinteal!
But then this happened and that so I took a picture and then another and really honestly? I had the bestest weekend EVER.
(Yes, I capitalized EVER and that is annoying, and yes, these photos are free of boogers, but lest ye feel depressed rather than entertained, there is mold growing in my bathroom so as incentive to read all the way through I have taken a photo of that, too, Instagrammed the hell out of it and published it at the bottom of this post. Good times ahead!)
But first, there's this.
From a day in the park where we actually flew a kite because why go all inauthentic halcyon happy if you can't do it with a mothereffin' kite? And p.s., Bryan and Ozzy simply must form a rock band ASAP because this would make the raddest album cover. (Title track: Halcyon Happy with a Mothereffin' Kite.)
And this, the cover of Ozzy's solo album after a particularly tense studio session with his dad. This album will be called "Surrounded By Soccer Games But Too Young to Play" (Title track: Fuck Your Whistle, Guy in the Green Shirt.)
Attack of the 50 Foot Ozzy...
And this one? You guys, this one has rainbows around the edges and I didn't even put those there. That's how awesome my weekend was, rainbows around the edges of everything.
Even my mushrooms have hearts. Or something. I don't know. Here it is, the aforementioned promised pic of Behind the Curated Veil of Blogs: The Fungi Edition. One night I noticed these in a particularly dank corner and thought they were errant pieces of pasta but then a few days later there they were again and as cute as seashell pasta is these are not cute but kind of rubbery and very very wrong.
Bryan says we have to demo the whole bathroom which we were going to do anyway but now, after his truck broke down and we had to get a new fridge and--I mean, sick, right? Who shows you spore-bearing rot behind their toilet anyway?
Hearts and rainbows and Instagram set to the Hefe filter.