Sunday, July 5, 2015

Let's Do This

This is it. This it, that is. One of many its, because let's not be too dramatic about it; life is made up of so many of them.

This is it and that was that. It's the night before I go back to work after 6.5 months of being on medical leave, and something about it feels enormous. Even though I know this is just a Sunday night like so many others, and just because I go back to work doesn't mean anything is final. That's the thing with this disease and the treatment I had--there is no closure. Just take a stand and say a prayer. I mean, I did the most aggressive treatment, the riskiest but with the best odds of success, leaving me with the most fuck you way to fight back of all--moving forward. 

So on this night before a day that doesn't mean much at all, I am going to unabashedly post a string of pics of our last week in Stinson. Because these its are why I fought so hard and will move forward even harder. In no particular order, this is its...
Bryan, Zoey and Ozzy. My loves. If it's easy like Sunday morning, then Sunday evening is sappy. Whatever, I'm owning it because damn it if they don't take my breath away.
Foggy beach mornings chasing seagulls, and afternoon wrestling on big, ploufy beds.

 The cutest cafe in the sand. The cutest kids in all the land. 
Absolutely covered with sand, cuddling in the dunes.
Commandeering beach huts and finding that the best toys are driftwood, rocks and sand.

 Horseback riding in swim trunks and wetsuits. The horse didn't mind at all.

 On top of the world (even though this ladder only goes up about 12 feet).

 Getting over fear, and finally understanding what it means to get stoked.

Pretending to be a mermaid, or a shark. Even if that shark harness looks a little sub-alt-something or other, the goggles and the cheeks kill me.
This, all of it. Even with the horror of these last few years, I am the luckiest of the luckys, and no amount of thanks will ever come close to how very grateful I am.
Moving forward with a smile in my heart and a hug in my hand...happy Monday (tomorrow) and every one thereafter.

With Thanks & Love,


Mr. X said...

That is one seriously good-looking family. Those photos make me think about what I missed by not having kids. By missing all the messes and heartache, I also missed all the joy and love.

You really do look great with the short hair. It's good to see Bryan, too.

Lots of Xs and Os,

Mr. X

Petunia Face said...

Thank you Mr. X! For all of your support and kindness...

Robin said...

Your family is beautiful, you're beautiful, tomorrow you are going to kick ass at work. Break a leg.

Petunia Face said...

Thank you Robin!

Good Enough Woman said...

That looks like a seriously wonderful week at Stinson. Best wishes for the workday.


P.S. Can't believe Ozzy is skinning it!

Unknown said...

I don't know you, but I love you! Kick some ass, sistah! (P.S. I did my yoga training with Kaelan.)

Nancy Fastenau said...

Fabulous photos! Love the time you got at the beach before the work week. We all need to treasure those moments.

Anonymous said...

Wow, does that kid ever look like your brother in the goggles picture. Lovely summertime family pictures. ~ Ol' Neighbor Kirsten

Anonymous said...

Hey everybody, sorry I'm late, just wanted to wish Susannah and her beautiful family a wonderful, kick-ass Monday, (happy emotiji ) R.A.A.C.P.

Petunia Face said...

Hello all,

Thank you for being here, there, chiming in with your support. I felt it all day at work...and it was a great day. :)

Scribe said...

I may be a little late with my comment but never too late to express how I feel when I see a post like this. These photos and your post is exactly what perseverance, hope and love look like to me. You're kick ass, Susannah. You continue to kick ass - your illness, your fight, your movement as you take on life's challenges. It's inspiring. You're inspiring. And, your entire family are beacons of what life can be like when you never give up.

Bearden 365 said...

I loved all of those photos of its, but the one of Zoey on the surfboard with the hands thrown up behind--that was gasp worthy. What a moment. I'm so glad you were there to live it. A phrase tossed around in our house for those moments is "that's the good stuff, right there."