Public Service Announcement

Whatever you do, don't buy a bikini wax from Living Social at a place you've never heard of, particularly if that place turns out to be in a strip mall next door to Domino's Pizza. Then? If the lady makes you wait for 35 minutes even though you made an appointment? Don't act as if you're even mildly inconvenienced, seeing as how this is the same person who will be applying hot wax to your lady garden in about 5 minutes.

But wait, there's more.

If that same lady asks you if you want it all off and you say no, but at the exact moment you say no she answers her cell phone, maybe you shouldn't let her start slathering said hot wax on your bits while she has her phone still cradled with one shoulder. Chances are, she is not listening to you. These chances go up if she drops her cell phone on your vagina and picks it up and carries on her conversation as if you are simply a table, albeit a sticky one.

Too much?

Lastly: if at some point she asks you to flip over and you don't want to appear prudish or dumb so you do it, well then. I have nothing more to say about that.

The good news (I am nothing if not an optimist) is that I no longer want to get a hairless cat because, ew. Also? This gif has nothing to do with this story except for the fact that you're going to have to trust me when I say you really don't want a pertinent photo. Plus, I just freaking adore me some pissed off Joan Crawford (she is my spirit animal).

xo,
S