Thursday, April 30, 2015

#TBT: The She Who Walks Behind The Rows Edition

For all of you sweet people who tell me I look oh-so chic with my verrrrry closely cropped 'do, please know that I thank you, I love you, but I am also in the middle of having flashbacks to 7th, 8th and 9th grade. Anticipating the awk is like waiting for a 3 year old to throw a baseball at you. You can't help but flinch.
I particularly enjoy the middle pic in which I resemble Malachai from Children of the Corn.
But, you know, it's cool. I'm cool. There are flat irons now. Papier Poudres. Products that don't necessarily contain "tiny reflective color crystals" like Pazazz Styling Mousse. I won't use Sun-In or wear turtlenecks, especially not folded over. I'm good. It's all good.
Can't wait.
(But yeah, my eyes are doing that involuntary fluttering shut flinch thing waiting for it to hit.)

xo,
S

7 comments:

Mr. X said...

Dear Susannah,

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

Sincerely,
Mr. X

Petunia Face said...

Oh how I wish there was a way for readers to post their own 7th grade pics here in the comments. ;)

Mr. X said...

Post MY seventh grade photos?!? Even if it were possible, I couldn't do that to you or your readers.

Also, I should clarify that my laughter was in response to your clever quips and 80s references.

For what it's worth, I also used Sun-In. My hairstyle, of course, was also Malachai-esq. I mean, it WAS the 80s.

I graduated boot camp at the Naval Training Center in early 1986. A few months later, 'Top Gun' was released. I was there, in my stone-washed Guess jeans. Although, they were so tight, no guessing was actually required.

After arriving aboard ship, I started thinking about how to get around the city. With 'Top Gun' still etched in my psyche, I bought a motorcycle that, not surprisingly, looked remarkably similar to the one in the movie.

While riding through my first downpour, though, I realized that Hollywood is completely full of shit.

Although he might have seemed brave cheating death against a MiG-28 at 35,000 ft., Maverick never had to endure the sting of hair gel running into his eyes while piloting a two-wheeled vehicle and dodging city buses.

Oh, how I miss the 80s.

Anonymous said...

All right, picture a giant squash with a weird nose, no eyelashes, and a tacky tunic thing and you pretty much have my 7th grade photo. ....of course, that was, like, last year...man I'm hideous. (weirded out emotiji)

Anonymous said...

7th grade wasn't so bad - I had already the typical hairstyle everyone else had and still does - long hair parted in the middle.

Yet, part of the 80s I lived in Europe and had very short pixie hair and once I came to the U.S. I felt so self conscious with everyone else having long hair. When my daughter was 13 years old and a freshman in high school (awkward to say the least), she got a pixie cut in Europe and when school started again, she practically was the only girl in the entire school with short hair. Everyone loved it though!

The thing is, you can see the facial features better with short hair and I think in a few months, you'll have the hairstyle that suits your face perfectly. You'll see!! I always thought Mia Farrow looked best with a pixie cut...

Anonymous said...

Mr X
Looks like you live(d) in my town....Top Gun was filmed here in SD. If I use binoculars I can see the runway from my house...

Petunia Face said...

Mr. X: Not to sound like a total mom (but I am), but I'm glad that the sting of gel in your eyes is all the hurt you endured on your motorcycle in the rain. Better to be a Maverick than a Goose. ;)

Ah, the 80s. So unbelievably bad, yet I'm so glad I saw it all with my own eyes (rimmed with turquoise eyeliner).