Wednesday, August 13, 2008

It's Wednesday, My Homework is due...

Hello Fellow Bloggers,
I had no idea how much stress this whole blog sitting would be. It’s like having homework, but worse, because it’s not homework and it’s supposed to be fun.

What the hell is wrong with me I am thinking? I even typed this all out in Word first so as not to make any spelling and grammar mistakes. I was also going to take the easy way out and divulge a bunch of anecdotes about Susannah, you know, silly stuff only I would know, being her friend for many years and all, but that’s a cop out and the good student in me won’t allow it.
To be honest, I feel all this pressure because for the first time, I actually get to write whatever I want to write. I started my blog as a way to keep friends and relatives and any one else interested in my health issues informed (fabulous breast cancer and all its glory) and to avoid many phone calls forcing me to repeat the same info over and over again. Now that I am relatively cancer free and just waiting for my new boobs my blog is mainly about my baby Sadie and how wonderful she is. And this makes me feel weird. I mean, who am I to think I am so special, my kid is so special, that a blog needs to be dedicated to her, that strangers and friends and family alike would want to spend their precious hours in front of a computer screen to see Sadie eat, pull at her toes and eek out a small smile? Frankly, who are any of us to think we are so special that anyone else at all would want to hear what we had to say, look at what we think is cool, watch what we think is interesting? Because that’s what blogs are. A sort of look at me, listen to me, here’s what I have to say forum.

I guess my conundrum is about not wanting to appear self centered, yet I spend at least a few hours a week doing nothing but writing about my life, my kid and myself. And blogging in general is such a new form of communication, there really are no rules. You can do whatever you want. Yet still, I feel so strange doing just that. I guess all communication had to start somewhere. I doubt the Egyptian drawing himself holding a vase of water over his head got made fun of by fellow Egyptians for, ‘writing all about himself’. Not that I am likening blogging to the ancient art of cave drawings, but would if I was? So what, right? All I know is that I hang out with Susannah all day and I still rush home to check her blog. All I know is that I have received amazing support from total strangers that have brightened some pretty dreary days. All I know is that I am going to keep writing, as long as people are reading.
Anyway, that’s what I had to say, being free of the Sadie and Cancer subjects, house sitting for Petunia face and just free thinking.
But I won’t leave you hanging. I know what you all really want to know, and it isn’t my confusion about blogging and what it’s supposed to be. Here's something only I would know about little Miss S (Well Big S since Sadie is the Little Miss S in my life now).

We used to work at a café when we were...hmmm… I don’t think I’ll divulge the age because we were way to old to be doing what I am about to tell you we did. The café was in a bookstore (remember when those were sprouting up everywhere?). The bookstore workers were snobs and made us feel like idiots for being café workers. The customers were even worse. Anyone that can spend the bulk of a weekday reading magazines they didn’t buy and getting free refills on coffee are total weirdoes. The job was a waste of our time, but the hours were good and it was easy. To blow off steam pent up from being mistreated by both the bookstore snobs and the weird customers, Susannah would doodle penis’s on napkins. Oh yes, lifelike and flaccid, with pubic hair details and saggy scrotum. I am cringing with embarrassment at the memory.
Then we would tuck them in to the stack and wait as unsuspecting patrons grabbed a napkin with their latte and have fits of laughter in the back when her artwork was discovered, like ice tea coming through our nostrils it was so funny. By the way, it's taking all my moral strength not to post an image I found online that resembles these drawings. Every time I do it, I delete it because it's just so wrong.

I am sure Susannah would rather I told you all she was a cheerleader her freshman year and could play Madonna’s ‘Love Don’t Live Here Anymore’ by ear on the piano (these are other less interesting details only I would know, though the list is far shorter now that she has a blog), but I thought this one just might pack a larger punch with her faithful readers. Ok, got to go, Sadie is waking up.

Take care,


Anonymous said...

that is the longest post that said absolutely nothing that i have ever read.

susannah, come back soon!

Allie said...

Wow anonymous, how rude can you be? Didn't your mother tell you, "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all"?

Great post Rosalie and I love your blog.

jozette said...

i'm having the same issue - i'm supposed to do the guest blogging tomorrow and i'm so nervous! i've been thinking about what i'm going to write all week, and still, i haven't come up with anything.

also, that was the funniest story ever.

jozette said...

oh, yea, and anon? that was so rude. if you read my post tomorrow here and don't like it... please keep it to yourself. i'm too weak to take the criticism.

I *Heart* You said...

hey anonymous - that was a really helpful comment. i'm sure susannah will be thrilled to know she has readers that are mean to her close friends.

rosalie- i totally enjoyed your post and feel the same way sometimes! your baby girl is precious and i love all the stories.

all in all GREAT post. forget anonymous. i already have.

Rosalie said...

Jozette, how bout write about how it's only anon-assholes who write mean comments on blogs. For ONCE I would like to see someone have the balls to actually show who they are.

Regardez Moi said...

rosalie - i know. it sucks. i mean, if you wouldn't write it using your real name, should you really be saying it? dumb.

Tobi said...

Perhaps the mention of flaccid penes hit Anon. a bit too close to home.
I loved your post Rosalie.

Erin said...

Anon strikes again! Always the whiny little chicken sh*t who is clearly so ashamed of her own comment that she can't even provide a name.

Nice post, Rosalie. Sadie really is a cutie!

Judy said...

Hey, Rosalie,your guest posting Rocked! You articulated so well a number of things I've been tossing around myself. For starters, the questions you posed about the nature of blogging. Though I am not a fellow blogger, I can tell you without a doubt that most bloggers are brave.The ones I have been fortunate enough to "meet" here as a result of PF are also talented, hilarious, dedicated and, oh so generous. No one ever has to read any blog-not anytime, anywhere. The reason you or anyone else writes a blog differs from one to another-probably even day to day. You graciously shared the initial reasons for yours (and as a friend, longtime admirer and ever willing "other Mom" I am so proud of you for doing so)and I believe the world is a little bit better place for having your courageous, compelling blog out here. I think we all know where I stand as re nasty Anons...and this particular rude asshole deserves to be locked in a small room for ten years with Paris Hilton, Jessica Simpson, Brittany, George W. and The Hoff to really find out what talking infinitum about nothing and bad manners is really all about!

And to answer one question you posed, just look at the people who read your own blog, not to mention those who have been informed, comforted and entertained by it and come back for more and there's your answer. You write the blog for your own personal reasons. You choose to put it out there for personal reasons-not the least of which is that it is an amazing,new forum.Not one soul is forced to read any blog and if they do and they get something from it, they return, if not there's a LOT of other bloggers and a million other ways to spend their time. Your readers, like those here and those visiting and spilling in from other guest bloggers and blog friends are here of their own free will and we all keep coming back because you, Sus and the others SPEAK to us...and just maybe you speak for us...perhaps (and I refer to myself) you do what some can't and would like to do. So, as the official PF Mom, the one who shows up a little too often and cheers a little too loudly and talks a lot too much and reacts like a crazed Bear when my cub or cub's best buddy, almost one of the family adopted daughter and honored, invited blog-tender of the day; I officially say to rude, cowardly Anonymous "Just Go Fuck Yourself because you deserve each other and probably couldn't find any other willing partner...and either go away or shut up!"

One of the many reasons I read PF is that I constantly find out more and more about my daughter-both as she reveals herself and from blogger friends. I loved your story. It was a gift. It also gives credence to my former comments re the not so hidden anymore secret Naughty Sus whose Inner Diva and Uber Bitch (that's a Good, nay Great thing, BTW) seems to be making occasional appearances. Your post spoke to me, entertained me and gave voice to many of my own questions-and clearly those of others as well. Those of us who have the honor to be asked to guest blog, are all saying the same things...if we can write about anything, what the Hell do we choose? Why me (speaking personally) I'm not a writer and if I were, Sus has me outclassed and outmanuevered talent-wise in every way? How do I write something that is of any interest to others and aren't I the little, old narcissist to even try, to even imagine that anything about my life, what I think, who I am is of any interest to anyone but myself and, hopefully, my family and friends? And, therein, is just one of the wonderful things about blogs, the blog world and blog friends; if they come and stay, even return and if we are not only tolerated but encouraged and supported, then there's our answer and all we need to continue to write whatever we can or want.

As MOPF, I thank you. As your friend and anytime stand-in Mom, I thank you. As me to you in general, you are Fucking Amazing here, there and everywhere. I would be proud and relieved if anything I contribute to this blog past, present or future has anywhere near the substance and talent you have demonstrated!

corine said...

You got yourself a new reader from this post alone :-)

The other day at the book store I wondered as I leafed through free magazines while sipping my refill: when-oh-when will anything interesting happen to me? I'll tell you, a hairy penis drawn on napkin would have been just the thing.

Megan said...

I hate that anon.

Rosalie, I was waiting for your post, and kept reloading the page until it was there. Sometimes I hate my blog because I have nothing to say. You and Susannah rule because you are so bold, you aren't afraid to tell it like it really is. I'm not that confident. Thanks for being who you are, your style is awesome. Blog and real life, you always keep it real.

Jessie said...

Rosalie, I have been a reader of your blog since Sadie was born, and I just think you are amazing.

This story about Susannah was the perfect end to a wonderful post, and I just know "Big S" will enjoy.

Brie said...

Hi Rosalie! I liked your post a lot! I totally agree with you r/g the whole blogging thing too... it's weird but fun, I've met some really nice people and it keeps me organized. At least that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it!

I think your napkin sketching fun is completely hilarious and I also think mean anonymous posters SUCK!

Courtney said...

I loved this post!!! And I guarantee every single blogger has felt your sentiments. You are so incredible brave and thank you for honestly sharing your feelings with all of us.

Becca said...

loved the story of the penis pics on the napkins. :) tee hee

thismslife said...

Rosalie- Great post! Sadie is adorable and if you just posted a picture a day alone, I would come stop by and look and grin. I think this blog business is hard. I just started mine and am just being shy still not really blogging about the things I want to say. So, I think you all are very courageous. The smallest of sentiments or funniest of stories just really get me through my day at work. My sister and I were just having a phone conversation about how the little things in life are so important to happiness. So, if someone makes me think, laugh, cry (my first time to read Petunia Face was the Mother's Day post and I teared up and had sneak out to the bathroom), whatever, I consider it all a little gift. I mean, we all get to choose which blogs we read, so if you just don't get someone then you just get to go elsewhere.

Oh, and, Judy, I love your comments. I really want you to start a blog!

Robin said...

Great post! I think everyone who writes a blog feels that way to some degree.

I adore both you and Susannah from reading your blogs and to think that bookstore snobs or that pesky anonymous could fail to recognize your fabulousness is beyond me.

And the penis drawings? Awesome.

And Judy's comments? So Perfect...which reminds me, I thought you were supposed to have a guest spot here - advice column style?

Pippa said...

well thank you for that, thank you very much. Are you going to come over here and wipe up the mess that is the diet coke that splurted EVRYWHERE when i completely lost it laughing about the penis napkin story? very funny, true and spoken from the heart - just like a petunia face post, so i have no idea what anon was on about

Pippa said...

well thank you for that, thank you very much. Are you going to come over here and wipe up the mess that is the diet coke that splurted EVRYWHERE when i completely lost it laughing about the penis napkin story? very funny, true and spoken from the heart - just like a petunia face post, so i have no idea what anon was on about

Petunia Face said...

Dearest Rosalie,
Anonymous doesn't even deserve one of our penis drawings. No, a flacid dick is too good for him/her. What anonymous needs is a scrawled chicken scratch of an asshole, drawn angry and tight, the ballpoint pen poking holes through the napkin. Blah. Go to bed and get far under the covers--at least that's what I do when I get a flaming bag of poo comment from an anonymous twit. Or, if you're you, um, which you are, you will face this annoyance with a laugh like you always do. Cause you rock.

Once again, a bitchin' post from one of my guest bloggers, even if she did out me as a 9th grade cheerleader (you bitch). Just you wait until Rosalie goes on vacation and I gueest blog for her! Ha! Oh, have I got me some stories... Shit. I just remembered. Rosalie hardly ever goes on vacation.

Oh well. Once again I am forever indebted and forever in gratitude.

Love from the Open Road,

Judy said...

WHAT is up with me and blabbing on and on this week? It's for sure more than just Sus being away (I'm thinking I get a free pass if I'm not jumping in on her own posts like the embarrasing, proud, doting MOPF that I am;plus she doesn't have immediate access to either my person or her Bad Mom Delete Button right now.)I clearly felt strongly about Anon's ignorant, rude,cowardly snipe at someone I know and love-and whose blog I love and admire-and whose guest post today was terrific. Sus is quite the little artist, isn't she.....flaccid penis on unsuspecting customers' napkins...brilliant).
I DO kmow that I am procrastinating like the master at it I am. I took today off to leisurely pack and preen so as to be prepared and gorgeous at 6-fucking-30-in the a.m. when HEJ arrives in my Hood to pick me up and head for The Wedding.I want to insert here a public thanks and say how much I appreciate his generous offer in allowing me to ride along-thus saving me from the horrors of airport lines, security, etc.-not to mention he's a great driver, host and company-it's a bonus feature to this joyful trip. (See, I just can NOT stop "talking"!) It will surprise no one who knows me that I am stark naked,ungroomed since I awoke, still in bed, yakking away here, not one thing packed yet, blew off the fake tan and pedi I had meant to get and yet here I am...again and more.

When it comes to words and writing, my style veers radically from real writers like Sus, her Dad, her Bro and many out there in blogland. I use words as if I had a lifetime, unlimited supply and were amassing frequent user cash awards. If one is good,then a dozen is much better. I have watched HEJ write a couple sentences on a postcard. He took a long, long time and clearly thought about every word, every phrase. I'm sure that to him there was only one, perfect word and only one-nothing else would work and he wouldn't compromise....and he certainly wouldn't just use a scattergun mix of words to cover the lack of the right word. Susannah does the same thing-her wrting is spare and clean and she not only throws out many ideas and, magically, pulls them all together in a boffo ending, but she also uses her words much like her Dad. And then there's me. I love words, even have a pretty good vocabulary, but I use words like a verbal glutton. And there's the nut of me and how I so differ from my writer family members.
Whether it be words or jewelry or, almost name it, MORE is not only MORE, it's BETTER!
Thanks to both Mystery Mississippi (I can't find your name but love your gorgeous blog!)and to Robin for your kind remarks. One might well ask why I would need my own blog when I so freely use my daughter's (For the record, I am well aware that I can't continue like this. Sus will return and I will have to keep my promise not to cheer her on too much and not to comment on every post....and then there's the length of my comments issue also) For a variety of reasons since PF left for some quality family interstate travel time and The Wedding, I've been in a really talkative mood and with me, the concept of holding back and not blabbing to everyone about every, single thing I think, is a foreign concept. And, of course, this has been FUN...great guest blogs, fantastic comments (well, all but asshole's) and at least one of us is running amok (that would be me).

And to FINALLY get to the point of this comment (yes, there IS a point to this though as always, I got sidetracked....a lot.
To answer some questions/comments... Ms. Miss, I won't be doing my own blog since I'm too lazy, too undisciplined, too tech-challenged, much too wordy and all over the place and I have too much fun horning in for free. but it made me feel great that you asked!

And Robin, I have been asked to be a "Guest Blogger" by my sweet, trusting daughter. Is she the bset or what? I know she asked because she loves me and knew it would make me feel really good. Ironically, the ONLY restriction she put on the invite was that it not be too long. Well, that's like asking Zoey to stop being so damn adorable and sweet. Just isn't going to happen 'cause I can't do it. I forget where I am in the line-up-maybe Friday? It's also entirely possible that, given my "War and Peace"-like volume of comment verbal diarrhea, I might be scratched from the substitute team. If so, it was an undeserved honor to be asked given the incredibly talented company in which I was included...and no matter what, I've had a blast so far this week! And now, I had better start packing or it's going to be a very embarrasing early morning.

Anonymous said...

i recently posted a comment on a well known blog (with my real name even!) about how nasty the comments were that day - they were directed at a named individual who we all know, and this person had mentioned to me that she often reads the comments and it was quite hurtful for her to be singled out. so i commented (with my real name) and said basically hey, she's a great girl...lets all stop the nastiness and give her a break. the owner of the blog then called me out, with my real name, and said "it's not your blog!"


please sir said...

Haha! I know what you mean - blog sitting can be a little nerve racking!

The Lil Bee said...

Rosalie, I was so excited to read your post because, of all the guest bloggers, your blog was the one I had yet to visit. What a friggin HILARIOUS story!! That is so something my friends and I would do in our spare time... I MEAN back in the day.

Will definitely check out your blog...that Sadie is darling;)

zakary said...

If I found a penis napkin while I was getting a latte, I would frame it.

Nothing cool ever happens to me.

Nice job, Rosalie!

SGM said...

Fantastic post, Rosalie. How old were you guys when you worked at the coffee shop? I'm dying to know. Anything under 88 years old is acceptable to me. :) Oh, and your baby? I want to eat her up!

Judy, I am totally cracking up that you mentioned The Hoff. So icky, isn't he? But I loved the content of your comment too. Happy wedding!

bakingwithplath said...

Your little one is so adorable! I loved this post. Anon can shove it.

Kelsey said...

Rosalie, that was a great post. I'd never read your blog before yesterday, but after I read your guest post, I decided to check it out and JEEZ--I ended up reading the whole thing from beginning to end! And let me tell took a while, but I laughed and cried and loved it. You're fabulous!

Anonymous said...

"i recently posted a comment on a well known blog (with my real name even!) about how nasty the comments were that day - they were directed at a named individual who we all know, and this person had mentioned to me that she often reads the comments and it was quite hurtful for her to be singled out. so i commented (with my real name) and said basically hey, she's a great girl...lets all stop the nastiness and give her a break. the owner of the blog then called me out, with my real name, and said "it's not your blog!"