Of course first I called Bryan at work all panicked and sobbing, making him promise to still find me sexy. Not sure if I was on speaker phone or not, but a promise is a promise and his whole office will hold him to it.
Then I did this.
Let me just say that there is nothing more surreal than standing in a bathroom shaving your head with your dad. We tried to have fun, but it was emotional/awkward/just really fucking weird for both of us.
This is my you talking to me? Other impromptu sketches included skinhead, Lilith Fair attendee, I pity the fool, and office guy with weekend warrior corporate faux hawk. Also? I never knew I had a.) such a small head, and b.) such man hands.
Then we took it down a notch and shit got real.
Nowhere to hide.
The good news is my ears don't stick out. The bad news is I look like a man and am really going to have to up my lipstick & lash game.
For the most part, you'll probably see me like this:
Although part of me thinks the hat makes me look more chemo-y. Then again, soon even my stubble will fall out and there will be no denying that this is not a fashion choice or even a lifestyle choice but a choice to look like the hairless cat that I have always wanted even though no one will let me get one. See? Deny me my Sphynx and I shall rise looking every bit the Spynxter! Wait, no...
Whatever. Bowie had it right when he said Just gonna have to be a different (wo)man. Because time may change me...but I can't trace time.