Monday, June 9, 2008

To the Kicky Tune of a Dirge

A moment of silence, please?

The Original Petunia Face

September 2, 2007 ~ June 6, 2008

R. I. P.

So... did you hear the one about that girl who deleted her own blog? She was trying to clean up the clutter of unused email accounts by deleting them, so concerned was she of debris in the double u, double u, double u? I mean, polar bears are facing extinction, drowning in the quickly rising Arctic sea. The girl thought to herself, hey, self, yes, I drive an SUV and yes I shop at The Gap and no, I do not bring canvas bags to the grocery store. But you know what I can do to help the environment, self? I can toss out my old email accounts! Because surely susannahclay AT gmail.com has a Shaq-sized carbon footprint! Surely that is a good idea, a little spring cleaning on a Friday night.

HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!

Oh, what a weekend it was. I very nearly divorced my husband when, in the midst of my head spinning around over deleting my own blog he had the gall to suggest we watch a movie. SEMI-PRO? YOU WANT ME TO WATCH WILL FARRELL PLAY BASKETBALL WHEN I CAN BE SITTING ALONE AT THIS COMPUTER WEEPING WHILE I TRY TO REACH THE UNREACHABLE? WHILE I STALK THE INAPPROPRIATELY NAMED HELP DESKS AT GOOGLE AND BLOGGER? HELP ME, HELP ME, HELP ME! THERE IS NO EMOTICON FOR WILL SOMEBODY PLEASE FUCKING HELP ME?! Will Ferrell is funny, but he's not that funny.

And Google and Blogger have still not gotten back to me. It's their fault. I mean, sure I guess technically I'm the one that hit delete without reading that boring little paragraph explaining what exactly would be deleted. But come on. I LOVE THROWING THINGS AWAY! Torn open envelopes, receipts, stray socks, soy sauce packets in the kitchen drawer. These things, if you let them they will weigh you down in a choke hold of toomuch-edness. At least that's what I used to think. But I've learned my lesson now and I am never throwing away another thing again. I plan on setting up hundreds of unused email accounts just in case; I will suscribe to the newspaper and buy dog food in bulk even though we don't have a dog and this will be my house in no time at all:

So here we go, Petunia Face Redux. New and Not Necessarily Improved. In fact, loosely stitched together with the stuffing poking out like a sigh.

See, while I did not have the good sense to back up my blog on an outside server (because that would have taken an ounce of forethought and I had my forethought circumcised ages ago), I did have all of my posts emailed to me. You know, on one of my other email accounts. One that I blessedly did not delete. So I have been painstakingly unearthing each post and cutting and pasting them onto this new blog. I have to re-format each one and find the photos again. Typos remain incorrect and any additions I later made are gone. If I have linked to something, sometimes it sticks, sometimes it doesn't. And I have lost all comments forever. All networks I had, connections, nominations, blog rolls I was included on, comments, accolades, hate mail, it's all gone. Poof! Like an unclaimed fart that doesn't stink. Petunia Face the OG might as well have never happened at all.

And that is my story. A cautionary tale of a Virgo gone awry. Of a consumer who sobs when she thinks of a polar bear frantically doggie paddling to an iceberg drifting miles away. Of a lover of words who throws away bank statements yet keeps her 5lb. Norton Anthologies of English Literature from college. Of a woman who was once a girl with the Face of a Petunia who has now become a sequel knowing full well that sequels never sell.

Slightly Abashed Plea: If you have me on your blog roll, on your Google reader or some other type of feed, please oh please correct it with this new address. Because right now? A whopping 7 people on my Site Meter. This for a blog from a woman who hits refresh on her Site Meter at least a dozen times every hour. Refresh, refresh, refresh... I'm obsessed. Please help me get the word out there. Even if the word is that I am the moron who deleted my own freaking blog.

51 comments:

karey m. said...

done!

megan said...

you got it, cautionary tale absorbed. I was dying for you yesterday, dying . If my husband has any ideas I'll forward them to you.

I *Heart* You said...

i am just happy you are back! and tell bryan that semi-pro is GARBAGE!!! seriously, will ferrell must have lost a bet with the wilson brothers or something.

Jennifer said...

You'll put Humpty back together again in no time!

Gin said...

Yay, you're back!
Please don't leave ever ever ever again!

Judy said...

I so feel your pain...I certainly felt mine when I tried to access your blog and got a dire looking message that it had been deleted by the author???? I am almost certain that a good tech person can retreive it but nevertheless, here you are beaten but not broken. Petunia Face, the original, had roots and now you use them to start a new growth. I'm so glad that you emailed your posts to yourself! Onward and Upward...NOTHING keeps a good writer down long!
Mom

Maggie, Dammit said...

OK that totally explains it because I was reading your latest post in my Google Reader and then I clicked through to leave a comment and it said you weren't there so I just assumed you had deleted that post - not the whole blog!

You poor, poor thing. :(

Anyway, I fixed my blogroll and hey, look at it this way: now you will show up as unclicked in everyone's blogroll (like you know how links turn a different color after you've clicked them?) so maybe a bunch of new people will come over from everyone's newly bolded Petunia Face in the blogrolls.... what.... no? I think yes.

*sigh*

sorry this happened, luv.

Sarah said...

Thank god! I was all worried something happened to you. Like a concerned parent, I spent the weekend looking at all the San Francisco papers hoping to not find an article of your untimely demise!
Okay so maybe I'm a freak. Glad you're back!

Jen said...

Oh we love you, sequel or not!!

And I feel dumb, but what is a blogroll?

::{J}:: said...

What a bummer, I don't know what I would do if that happened to me, but I'm sure you'll recover!

Petunia Face said...

Thank you all for so much support. And for not laughing at how stupid I am, or at least not loud enough that I can hear it.

Jen--don't feel dumb. I see that you JUST started your own blog--congrats! Stay away from the delete button. A blog roll is the list of blogs that you love, usually located on the side bar.

Misplaced Country Girl said...

Thank God you're back! I might silently stalk you, but without you I'm really nothing. Okay, well maybe not nothing, but my day isn't the same without coming over to see what genius thing you are writing about that day. I missed you terribly and if you could please just live in a hell hole of trash from now on it would be great for me. Glad to have you back and I will be updating my blog roll right now.

zakary said...

Hi! So sorry about your trauma this weekend. Glad your back.

How the f do you back up your blog on an outside server? Let me go find my seven year old daughter. She probably knows.

Seriously? Should I be doing that?

Charlee Palmer said...

Thanks to Megan at Beach Bungalow 8 for steering us in your new blogspot direction.

We are here and we need the fix!

hej said...

Blog roll or not, from the ethers and the ashes, PetuniaFace rides again!

Smitty said...

I nearly had a heart attack when your blog vanished. I kept checking the link throughout the weekend, thinking it would magically reappear: "This time it's going to be there, I know it!" Thank goodness you're still here...welcome to your new home!

SGM said...

I though it was ME, not YOU. Whew! Glad you're back!

JackeeG4glamorous said...

Susannah, Might I have to nominate you again? and then again, for MOST TECHY Blogess? HA! Yeah, my husband said I was almost a Petunia Face stalker, because we (Sarah and I) thought you moved without telling us, like THAT has ever happened before. um, we were perplexed. Alas, we are so very dramatic, we thought of dozens of things that MAY have happened to you, but delete, that wasn't one of them. But a great post came out of it. All's well that ends well. As one who hangs on to just about everything, it's nice to clean house once in awhile. Missed you, glad you are back to entertain us so. And glad you are OK!

Pink Wallpaper said...

i am so happy you are back!! my mom is a huge fan of yours and she was actually the one who told me that your blog was gone before i even knew!! and then she called to give me the "update" about the deletion!

mamacita said...

Okay, I updated you on my blogroll. You will have MILLIONS AND MILLIONS of visitors any minute now.

The Lil Bee said...

Oh, such a bummer. I feel pretty stupid...I've never backed up my posts. I wouldn't even know where to begin!

My blog is pretty new, but I would be happy to add you to my blogroll;) Anything to help keep the sanity intact so your house doesn't look like that pic!

Manager Mom said...

Oh my goodness. I just got the bad shivers. And I needed this warning because I am the most Virgoey of all the Virgoans. I am Virgo with Virgo rising. I throw away and delete EVERYTHING.

I never knew you before though, so glad I discovered you now!!!

Lara@Paper Doll said...

Consider it fixed on my blogroll. Glad you're back!

Anonymous said...

You have no idea the panic I felt!! Ha-ha maybe you do....First thing this morning I visited all my blogs, looking for someone to give me an answer. Thank goodness for I *Heart* you.....phewww. I found you. I was so happy!. I'm glad your back, I missed you and was worried.

pati said...

Ooops...that was me and I'm not "anonymous'....

Rachel said...

Updated, and glad you are back!

Anonymous said...

One Sunday morning I got up and decided that I had to wear a certain hair clip that, for some stupid reason, I kept hidden in my jewelry stash. I hide it because we've been robbed a number of times. Anyway, I couldn't find it and started FREAKING out immediately thinking that I donated the thing I was hiding it in to Goodwill. I was crying and incoherent. I told my husband I couldn't go anywhere until I found it. He drove me to Goodwill, they weren't open so we came back home and, of course, I found it. I had to stay home from church because my face was all spotty and puffy.

The lesson is: throwing things away is DANGEROUS.

Sparkie said...

Oh my lord. I feel for you. I still have an icky feeling in the pit of my stomach, having done micro versions of this. Thanks to BB8 for piloting me back to PF harbor. Shouldn't there be a way to redirect from deletion page?

Brie said...

yay! you've been found :) I am adding you to my list and now I am super psyched b/c this new shiney blog doesn't freeze my computer!

JackeeG4glamorous said...

Isn't it swell to be loved? But the thing that has prompted me to leave a 2nd comment, breaking the POLICY of comment leavers, (and now acting as though we are conversing)...I ask, please post a tell all post on how we should back up said blogs to another server. You are now our collective tech support.

Tobi said...

Soy feliz que estás aquí otra vez!
If I could cuss for you in Spanish I would. Yes, I would. Cuss and spit that's what I'd do!

Bearden 365 said...

Yay you're back!! YAY!

Jessie said...

Thank GOD you're alive!

tara said...

I just found your blog today- you're too hilarious! thanks for the comment on mine- just getting started in this crazy cyber-world :)

Courtney said...

YAHHHHH It was all a bad bad nightmare. You really are here! And while you may not think you backed up, I'd say emailing yourself your posts was pretty darn genius.

Emily said...

even after you had told me what you had done, i was in total denial. i thought for sure MY computer would still have you there in my favorites. i couldn't imagine a day without my daily dose of pf. thanks rosie for getting the word out. may i suggest a little circle/slash over that delete key?

pve design said...

and I thought you had "run away from home" and not even let a final note (post)
glad you are back.
this sounds like something I would do! I love to throw away too.

Kimberlee said...

oh my god, i didn't sleep last night!!! I logged in for my PF fix after being away from my computer for three days (long weekend in Australia) and I was SOOOO worried. Thank god Paige at "I Heart You" filled me in on the good news. Your Blogs are my two very bestest favourites (and i'm not tarting around blog world saying that either, you can check!!) - so thank you so much xx

Sucker For Marketing said...

Got you updated on my blogroll too! Sorry for the extra work you have had to do. Ugh. Glad you are back!

Tessie said...

Shit. SHIT!

Dude, I am so sorry. I don't know how to backup my blog, or what exactly that would entail, but I think I'm at the point where I would be WICKED BUMMED to lose the whole works.

I have comment sections out there that have been the only thing between me and a 5-day bender.

I'm sorry, man. I'll make the change on my Reader.

Kwana said...

Your story just tore at my heart. I'm so happy you kept it all together and rallied through. Cheers to you!

Mrs. Blandings said...

Susannah - Updated my blog roll and my bookmark - everything will be back to normal in no time. The funny thing is, my son has a gmail account and I went in to delete it this weekend and, thank goodness, noticed that mumbo jumbo. Doesn't seem like a good system when deleting an email account would affect everything you have done in that system. Guess that's the downside of "free."

NucMEd is Hot said...

I had never read you today, so not only did you get it fixed, I'm going to add you right now! You are hilarious

Shannon said...

Whew. Was worried for a moment...staring blankly at Blogger,asking why, God why. Then low and behold a comment on Daisychain and there you are!
Glad you're back!

Janet said...

Oh my, you've been a busy girl. Glad to know about the gmail blog connection, I would have never known. Love your blog, just discovered you.

Erin said...

Just have to add my comment to make it an even 45. Glad you're back, PF (PFG now?)!

cyndi & lee said...

I'm so glad you're back! I honestly felt sick when I clicked on the link to your blog (as I do every day) and found that it had been removed!! I couldn't believe it and figured something screwy must have happened. For three days I've been terrified that I'd never get to read your amazing words again -- thank goodness that isn't the case!

Hannah said...

so glad that you're back!

Annie Empiric said...

dear lord. breath in. you had me SO worried. spreading the good news.....

design for mankind. said...

Awww, my dear. I'm SO SORRY TO HEAR THIS!

But don't you just love a blank slate???

Petunia Face said...

A thousand thank yous and more to all of you for finding me once again, for your support and friendship. And most of all, for not saying I told you so! You should have backed up your server!

I love all of you, each and every one in a somewhat creepy cyber way.

Love and a Delete Free World to you,
Susannah