With absolutely no hyperbole whatsoever, I have no idea how this reindeer toy got into my house. Which in and of itself is kind of creepy, but then it scoots its little reindeer bum all over the carpet like a dog with a tapeworm or irritated anal sacs or ho ho hey there! Please disregard my dirty floors. This is one of the reasons I will never own a dog. See also: don't hate me, but the barking. And the poop bags. And the boy dog parts.
The most disturbing thing is that I hate lists of 2. Because two things? Does not a list make. I have searched all over my house for at least one other weird thing to include here. 3? 3 is good. But I can't find anything else. So now this is just a post about a mystery reindeer with an anal sac problem and a troll with a pokey ugly penis.
Happy holidays then.