Sunday, August 5, 2012

(1 Unread)

I kept waiting for something to happen. Instead nothing happened but this: Ozzy started walking. We went camping. Zoey got carsick. Bryan turned 40. Zoey walked in on us having sex. Totally unrelated, although I'm pretty sure it did happen in that order. And now it is a nondescript day in early August and I am back, because the trouble with waiting for something to happen is that so many little life things happen you cannot decipher what exactly you were waiting for in the first place. Was that it? The sign?
Did you see it? Not a sign, but my redesign. I redesigned my blog because I figured I needed to be refreshed. Like when I feel blah and a new shirt makes me feel sharp again. What do you think? Here's the thing: I don't think I'm done yet. The fonts on the right side nav bar are all wonky, nothing matches, some of it is way out of date. But I'm starting again anyway. This is the new and improved Petunia Face. The one that has slid backward, because once upon a time I started this blog for myself. To write what I wanted when I wanted without a thought in the world to you reading it. And along the way I met some fabulous people, my page views went up, I made a teeny bit of money and wanted more. More money, more of you, more comments, more links, more metrics, more more, and it became less about me just writing. Which is totally my fault, of course, caring when the amount of comments went down. But they did and I do, only I have realized that sometimes backward is the right direction to go. This blog is never going to make me money. Or famous, or published, or fill-in-the-blank. It is only going to make me me.

So hello. I'm back. Without a story this time, but a quote:

“The more you document your own life, the more you check in, you tweet, the more you post photos of what you did last night, the more you do all of this stuff, or even in my case, the more you listen for little lines of dialogue that can make their way into stories, the more you photograph moments, in a way, the more you start to step out of those moments, and if you do that too much, you become a spectator to your own life.”
- Jonathan Harris

I realize I am jumping all over the place. I am a writer, a blogger, social media murders the moment, blah blah, my daughter walked right up to the side of the bed, thank god we were under the covers. But this is it. I'm figuring it out as I go along. But I'm back.

love,
S

29 comments:

Jules said...

Yay! Also, I LOVE the design. Very Northern California, very you.

thevioletpear said...

like!

Diana K. said...

YAY!

Simply Mel {Reverie} said...

YES!

Pati N said...

yaaaay:)

Kate said...

I love your words. Every. Last. All over the place word.

anita said...

oh thank god you're back!!
and with a very righteous new design....

my favorite and my best- MFAMB to you said...

as a general stalker and part time commenter i am super fucking psyched.

CaitiB said...

Welcome back!

Meg said...

I'm so happy you're back! This is the best part of my day, hands down.

The French Tangerine said...

thank you jesus

Anonymous said...

Yay! Woo-hoo! New design and all. Express yourself (baby) however you want because it's about YOU....delightfully all over the place and all. I think one cosmic trick is to let go of expectations of what might or might not happen because of the blog and find joy in what you do best which is writing. It's when you let go that stuff happens. Welcome back. The 'sign' is you.
p.s. lock your bedroom door.

Anonymous said...

I've been following for a few years now and was so sad that you may be gone forever! (and that I'd have to keep seeing Mike Tyson in that darn orange getup.) Welcome back! WE MISSED YOU!

Anonymous said...

ditto on the yays

katie said...

so good. as always. so good.
love,
katie

Rolerkite said...

about damn time you came back.

Rolerkite said...

about damn time you came back.

Tamara said...

Color me excited. Oh, and yea!

Christie said...

I have been a reader for many years now and I was SO bummmed to think I would never read your stories again. I still checked your site everyday to see if you came back. I had a long weekend and come back to find you are back with a new design even!!! Oh HAPPY DAY!!!! :) Super glad you are back!

Christie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sunshine said...

I am glad you are back, as long as you are here I will be reading and commenting (well, that's if I feel I have something worth saying). Like the new look but if you think it still needs improvement I am sure it can only get better!

Anonymous said...

thank you jesus! i was scared for a bit there... :)

Heidi F. said...

Yay for us!

But seriously, I think you're a damn good writer and really do hope you're working on that book....

Buff said...

Hurray! The blogosphere is back to normal. Have so missed your posts!

Shannon said...

woot woot!

Anonymous said...

Yay!! I went looking for other blogs to replace my addiction to yours, but nothing measured up... so glad you're back!

Anonymous said...

i was wondering if you were going to post again and am glad you did. I like reading your thoughts.

Anonymous said...

welcome back.

Anonymous said...

Yay!!!!

Seriously where else could I go if I needed to see a picture if a sparkly disco penis?

Glad you are back!