Tuesday, July 27, 2010

And That's That (That's What She Said)

Everyone's been asking (and by everyone I mean my mother and my sister-in-law), how was the reunion? Alas, I am something of a pussy and cannot/will not tell tall tales of hair gone gray, thick necks and waists. I mean, who knows? I might see these *people in another ten years, right? (Holy Mother of all That is Inevitable: I will be 47.)Bryan & me: Zero Year Reunion, Grad Night 1990. Note the eyebrows, the scrunchie on my wrist just waiting to bring down the loft of my hair. Why was my head so large, anyway?

What I will say is this: As we drove into the parking lot of the restaurant I started apologizing to Bryan for making us go. Like really fast, over and over I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done this, I'm sorry, we don't have to go, what have I done? And then I asked him how we could find some pot because all of a sudden I really wanted to hot box our car even though I haven't gotten stoned since 2002.
Bryan and me: 10 Year Reunion, 2000. Note the bad Prom pose back when we were ironic and DINKS and slept 'til 11am on the weekends. (Now we are DIKS.)

I had to settle for a glass of white wine, then two, then more. Why white wine I will never know seeing as how I have never ever liked white wine but it seemed like something a 37 year old who has her shit together would drink, yes? Sauvignon Blanc, a crisp Chardonnay? Seven of them, please. (And now I have said pussy and shit in this post, i.e. this is not me, it's not, but who is? Here...)
Carrying on the tradition o'cheese: 20 Year Reunion, Saturday night.

So I got super drunk at my reunion and told boys that I used to have crushes on them and talked to the guy who set off a fart bomb in homeroom, apologized for making out with people so many years ago when I shouldn't have and hugged friends that I once swore I would never speak to again.

And on the way out at the end of the night I crouched down and peed in the parking lot.

All in all, it was mortifying, fun, drunken, humbling, stumbling, stupid and young. In other words: it was the perfect reunion.

The End.

*Not you. You are one sexy beast you Drake Pirate you who may be reading this after Saturday night. Honestly, you've aged well, pinkie swear.

16 comments:

sherri said...

I have yet to attend a reunion, I'd probably do the exact same thing as you and I actually enjoy white wine, so it might be ugly. Kudos to you for being so brave as to attend and you guys just get better looking over time!

A Perfect Gray said...

beautiful...

Megan said...

You're braver than me, my 20 year reunion was 3 weeks ago, and I didn't go. Isn't it ironic how a crisp chardy can make even the biatches worth a hug..

Petunia Face said...

To be fair, no one was evenly remotely bitchy, even before my wine induced hazy trip down memory lane. If anything it was all a bit of a love fest of people who made it out the other side of pleats and perms :)

Michelle M in KY said...

OH SUSANNAH...
ROFLMAO...This is too funny. Squatted & peed in the parking lot??? Were there not any public restrooms at the facility or were you concerned about running into a potential aqua colored shoes girl in the stall? This is hysterical. So glad you went, had fun, got drunk, & peed in the parking lot. Otherwise, you would have had to think of something completely different to make me laugh that hard.

Author said...

S didn't anyone tell you? We were all drinking white wine so our teeth don't turn grey. Nothing grown up about picking your liquor for vanity's sake ;)

Jules said...

Love. Mine is this weekend. Wish me luck!

p.s. You get better looking with each decade, which is not fair.

jennifer said...

wonderful photos!

Erin said...

I must admit, white wine is actually my drink of choice nowadays, but holy crap I might as well have been drinking Jack and Coke's like at the 10 year! I think we all had about 5 too many glasses of Chardonnay, which was fine and very fun that night, but I swear I'm still paying for it today.

LOVE the tri-decade photo montage of you and Bry!

ZDub said...

I love this, you guys are adorable.

And we would have a fantastic time together if we hung out, I peed in a parking lot a few weeks ago ON MY WAY HOME FROM WORK.

Geli said...

You look better now than you did 10 years ago Susannah!!
I've gone to my 10 year reunion and it was so utterly
boring, I vouched to skip the next 5 decades. Perhaps in my 70s I'll be interested who the hell is still alive
and can play bingo with me.

Petunia Face said...

You are all too kind. Honestly, it's not difficult to look better than the Grad Night photo :)

Robin said...

You two are so damn cute...and sounds like you had fun too. Good to know facebook has not totally obliterated reunions!

Maggie May said...

if i WERE to attend my reunions ( i don't ) i hope they'd be like this

krista said...

i went to my ten year reunion and had a great time but have absolutely no desire whatsoever to go to the 20 year reunion in august. it's not even like i'm avoiding it. i just don't care that much at all.
hmm.
fyi- hello 1990. i remember you. i think i looked just like you but add some overly long hot pink acrylic nails. yes.

Pink Wallpaper said...

i love this post...and the pics :)